Thursday, March 11, 2010
Not feeling the L.O.V.E ?
The last 7 months have been filled with endless amounts of Joy and Love since I had my son. Every day is an adventure with him and he has such an adorable personality that I find just about everything he does to be infectious. But that's how every mom feels about their new baby, right? Unfortunately that's not always the case.
While I have been enjoying just about every single second with my son, there have been moments along the way where the exhaustion, mountains of dirty diapers, a to-do list of things that never seem to get done and a weekly shopping list that resembles Groundhog Day every time I look at it- that were it not for my still lingering Baby Brain, I would have already had it committed to memory- can make even the most confident and blissed out mom feel tired or stressed.
Going from a twosome to a threesome can have multiple effects on your marriage, your life and your career. For most women this new endeavor is met with at first, some trepidation, then some nervous excitement, a little juggling and then ultimately an easy settling in. For others the responsibility, as well as the drastic change in lifestyle and as an individual, can be downright overwhelming. (Whichever side of the spectrum you fall on is completely justified.)
Being responsible for someone else's life, as well as their overall well being and shaping as a citizen can be daunting. It's a huge task, one you most certainly should feel ready to take on. Even women who feel this however before their baby arrives can start to second guess themselves, or their ability to succeed, which is totally normal. Add those feelings of uncertainty to a household where a colicky baby has just arrived and cries for several hours a day, a baby that even after several months still isn't sleeping through the night, perhaps a partner that isn't necessarily pulling their share of the weight, or just the shock of going from a full time career where freshly blown dry hair and cute spit up free outfits are replaced with days where finding the time to shower can seem downright impossible and it's no wonder that 1 in 8 women suffer from post partum depression.
While some women never reach a full blown state of depression, over 80% have reported feeling some level of highs and lows following the arrivals of their babies. Fortunately for most women, this emotional roller coaster is mild and usually remediates itself naturally, but along the way I'm sure many could use a few pointers on how to handle it all while, well, handling it ALL.
Enter Mindful Mommy, where Jennifer Brosnick, MSW is helping mothers-to-be as well as new mothers, cope with this new life change through a wide range of techniques, counseling and products. Mostly, through various Buddhist centric traditions, she teaches women who are either embarking on this new journey or whom are currently in the throes of it, how to live in the moment and ultimately enjoy the ups and downs that come with being a new mother.
No matter where you are in your life and journey as a new or expectant mother, it is truly a time to cherish as these little ones grow so quickly everyday and amaze us with all that they learn, see and do.
However, no matter how put together any woman may feel at times, the old adage holds true, it takes a village to raise a child and there is never any shame in reaching out or accepting help when you feel less like Superwoman and more like barely a woman on any given day. The fact is, we all have our moments and like the good times, we should embrace the tough times as well because it is in those moments where we ultimately find the most strength and really see what we're made of.